The Mahatma Letters to A. P. Sinnett

Letter No. 50

{Received Simla, around August 21, 1882} 

My dear friend, I feel terribly pulled down (mentally) with this unceasing attitude of unavoidable opposition, and as continual attacks on our strongholds! During the whole of my quiet, contemplative life, I have never met with a man more tenacious and unreasonable! I cannot go on like that, passing my life in useless protests; and if you cannot bring to bear upon him your friendly influence, we will have all of us to part company, at some not distant day. I was with the Chohan when I received the letter I now enclose, and — the Chohan was perfectly disgusted, and called the whole thing the Tibetan name for "comedy." It is not that he is anxious to "do good" or "help the progress of the T.S. — "it is simply, believe me or not — insatiable pride in him; a ferocious, intense desire to feel and show to others that he is the "one elect," that he knows that which all others are barely allowed to suspect. Do not protest for it is useless. We know, and you do not. The Chohan heard the other day the idiotic but painfully sincere lamentations of the "wife" and — took note of them. Such is not a man who aims at becoming a "perfect soul" and he, who would write of a brother Theosophist what he has written to me of Fern — is no theosophist. Let this be strictly private, and do not let him know but what he will read himself in my letter. I want you to read the two letters before you take them to him, and I beg of you to be present when he reads them.

I will see what can be done for Colonel Chesney and I believe Djual Khool is after him. For the first time during my life I think I feel really disheartened. Yet for the sake of the Society — I would not lose him. Well I will do all I can, but I am seriously afraid, that he will spoil the broth himself some day.

Yours with sincere affection,

K. H.


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